Bob’s letter from the tandem: yeehaw ride em cow bears

Hiya All

I am feeling much perkier than my last letter from the tandem. My concerns about the sanity of the GOTF did not bear fruit. There was method in his madness with regard to visiting places we had already been to, he didn’t have a choice. I can also sense that we are getting closer to home, I recognised weeds and birds that I have not seen for a long time.

Since that last note he has dragged me through some really ‘outback’ places or as he said to me at one stage, “well Bob me old buddy, we are really in the wop wops now!” We have hardly seen a soul, especially over the last week as we rode from Whanganui to Otorohanga. We did see one person though, a police officer who waved us down as we were finishing our ride past some volcanos, well the GOTF said there were some but I never saw any. He said that they were hiding in the clouds. Anyway, this policeman waves us down and starts chatting to the GOTF. They both look at me and start shaking their heads. I overheard the GOTF dobbing me in! “I told him that he needs to wear his helmet but he has been a bit rebellious lately”. Officer Mornay heads back to the car and comes back with a tablet thingee and starts to ask questions like my name, address and then tells me that he is going to have to issue an infringement notice, whatever that is. The GOTF then tells officer Mornay that I am an Angel Bear and my Whanau have a special relationship with the police. He rabbits on and on about it and eventually the officer relents and said that as I am so special he will let me off with a warning. I think he was pleased to finally get away from us. I hope it doesn’t turn out to be like Christine’s big acting performance before Christmas where she thought she had got off with a warning only to discover a little ‘present’ in the Mail a few weeks later.

Despite the warning the GOTF said that I didn’t need to wear it because where we were going, if we saw a traffic cop, he was lost. Four days later I think we are lost. At one stage I saw a sign ‘Forgotten World Highway’ then we turned into a road that had definitely been forgotten and ended up in a village called Ohura that had also been forgotten, I think everybody had left and forgotten to come back.

We have become cowboys while we are in the wop wops (very appropriate name). Yesterday we mustered sheep, cattle and even some goats. I thought that it was fun, tried barking like the dogs that I have seen up in the hills but it came out like a bear growl/cough. I gave up and just waved my paws around a lot. Boy sheep are dumb, there was one bunch that were so stupid that they kept running in front of us right into the Main Street of Ohura. Then there were these cattle that were also trying to get the dummy-of-the-day award (DOTDA). That it is my secret award I give to the dumbest person or animal that I come into contact with on each ride. So far the GOTF has won it at least 90 times! Anyhow, these cattle were hoofing it along and the GOTF is getting a bit exasperated, not only are they running but one of them starts laying obstacles on the ground (great multitasking), like a bovine mine sweeper, to try and slow the GOTF. But after the Mt Nicholas debacle that old guy is pretty deft at manoeuvring the big bike around cow pats. He gets so close that I am worried that I might get buried in a pile of flying poo but the cattle spot some open land and charge off. Then around another corner and it is sheep again, this time I see something I have never seen, the sheep thinks that it is a horse and leaps over the fence. I was so impressed I gave some appaws.

Today the country became a bit more civilised and the GOTF again won the DOTDA. We were doing a big downhill and I hear the old guy issue a few profanities. Something about a wasp in his sandal. I have no idea what a wasp is but he is bleating like sheep. We stop and he rips his sandal of and starts cussing again. After doing this funny dance he settled down and we get going again. Not long after a hear him coughing and spluttering and the cussing starts again. This time he is muttering about a wasp getting in his mouth. His cussing sounds wery stwange now, he seems to have developed a lisp. We get to the next village and he gets an ice cream (I don’t get one) and starts shoving in his mouth. “Ah vat weels vetter” he incoherently splutters.

Hey, I want to share some feedback from Mama Bear at the Bald Angels. Firstly, a massive, bear hug thank you to the anonymous donor who gave our fund raising a huge lift. It arrived at a time when we were all a bit glum about how the fund raising was going. After hearing about it I had to tell the GOTF to ease up on the pedals. He was so stoked that he was going crazy, I was worried about our safety. Secondly, a little story about one young fella that our efforts have helped, as relayed by Therese at Bald Angels.

The level of need amongst our people is higher than ever, and we’re so grateful for all those helping you with fundraising . 

A little story from last week: the local High School asked if we could support a lad to play rugby. He’s been with his foster Nan for many years but she can’t navigate online registrations or afford the fees, the gear, the boots etc. So we jumped into action and have sorted it all for them. This 13 year old can now socialise, partake in healthy sports, learn all the skills that go with team work and engage with healthy role models this winter. 

Your fundraising helps make this happen. Thank you!

If you want to help motivate the wasp stung multi award winning GOTF and his trusty sidekick (me) to make it back to Kerikeri and, in the process, give more kids some hope, then you can donate at: https://givealittle.co.nz/fundraiser/the-angel-tandem-two-70and-year-olds-riding-7500km All donations go direct to The Bald Angels.

The GOTF gave me some really great news. In about a week we are picking up the RA, you know the one that rode south with us, and she is going to be back in charge. Bear hugs all around!