Bob’s letters from the Angel Tandem: Exciting times on two wheels

Hi Guys,

My turn to blog again as the GOTF said that he is too busy doing 1,001 other things every afternoon after we stop pedalling. Beats me as to what he’s doing, every time I see him he is eating MY HONEY or fiddling around with the bike. What is so important about the bike?

Since my last letter I’ve had a few major events happen. I’ve had my second trip on a ferry, this time it was a looong ride from the bottom of Auckland city out to a place called Pine Harbour, funny name as I didn’t see any pine trees there, but I saw heaps later in the week. It was a challenge to get the tandem on the ferry but with my help and some careful manoeuvring we did it. It was a great ride past all those well known islands in the Hauraki Gulf, the adults pointed them out but then started disagreeing with one another as to what island was what. The only ones they agreed on was Rangitoto – there is a selfie of me as we whizzed past.

One of the other exciting things that has happened is that I have had the pleasure of meeting more kids. I love kids. They are so much more fun than grown ups and although the GOTF and the Rear Admiral are mostly quite nice and all, I need kids from time to time to have some fun.

I met Hazel in New Lynn. She liked me a lot and Luca at The Matatoki Cheese Barn who had a bit of a ride on the Angel Tandem. Then there was Kedis and Juno at Arapuni. When we arrived at their place they had just arrived home to find a couple of their chooks had escaped down the road and Robyn, the kids mother, ran down the road to try and catch them while I entertained Juno so she wouldn’t run out on the road after her mother. I could tell instantly that Juno liked me a lot. Then we went to meet all the other animals they had. Their black shepherd puppy Neptune was beary enthusiastic, and their two calf club calves Thunder and Snowflake were beary boisterous when we bottle fed them, I didn’t get too close because one slurp and I’d be gone. But one of the best things is that they had beehives and they gave ME a lovely jar of their best kanuka honey. It is so delicious.They call themselves “Black Shepherd Apiaries”, on account that they have a black shepherd puppy. I didn’t want to leave. I mean why would you; kids, puppy, calves and honey. The GOFT and Rear Admiral had to drag me away kicking and screaming. I could hardly bear it.

I also like animals and goats seem to really like me as well. I I am being honest I think everybody likes me but let’s not share that with the two oldies. Anyhow, I met a grandpa goat at Matatoki, well I assume he was a grandpa because he had a big long beard. He wasn’t as friendly as Billy but he was an oldie just like the ones that I look after so what do you expect.

The other event that happened to me was that my legs nearly came off. I think it was because the GOFT and The Rear Admiral had been a bit rough with me. One leg was a bit longer than the other. The rear Admiral first of all said she wished it had happened to her so she would be a bit taller and then she wouldn’t have to go around telling people she was 11foot 4 inches instead of 4 foot 11 inches, but then she realised that this was all quite serious and I would need a double hip replacement. The GOFT offered to do the operation but there was no way I was letting him near me, he is always doing really dumb things. He’d likely sew a leg on back to front and then I wouldn’t know if I was coming or going. So Nurse Ruth (who is also the Rear Admiral) said she would do it. But then she got tired and so the operation was delayed a day. Typical of surgeons. At least she didn’t go and postpone it to play a game of golf like some. Anyway the operation went ahead the next day and was a complete success although a bit scary. Nurse Ruth seemed to know what she was doing and Bob’s your uncle I’m as good as new.

Today we rode from Waiotapu to Awakeri. We rode through endless pine forest, this time there were pine trees. The Kaingaroa forest is huge and used to be the largest hand planted forest in the Southern Hemisphere, the GOFT says “ the world” but what would he know. It went on and on and was pretty scary but when the GOFT declared that we were lucky in this country that we didn’t have grizzly bears living in our forests I got really angry. “Hey Bud! What about me don’t I qualify? I am a bear and I am feeling pretty grizzly at the moment”. Humans!

A friend of the GOTF sent him an email with a link to a newspaper article about some fella called Mike King having his e-bike stolen. He suggested that I should be made head of security. After my little performance in the forest the dumb old GOTF decided that was a good idea, especially as I know that I am in fact a grizzly bear. Thanks Rob! Great suggestion. I can’t wait for winter so that I can hibernate again. Staying up all night is making me really tired.

The weather has been great but on three days we have had a shower of rain and I have had to put my raincoat on. It is really cool, I get to be fully enclosed in this clear stuff that keeps my fur dry. The GOTF said that is my personal “Popemobile”. Stupid name, the GOTF says some pretty weird things at times.

Today we were riding to a place called Te Kaha on the East Coast. As we were pedalling along minding our own business there was a horrible screeching sound and a whoosh of feathers and wind. I heard the GOTF yell “magpie attack”. Now this confused me because the only pies that I have heard him talking about are steak and cheese and he usually attacks them. Anyway I quickly figured out that a magpie was this angry back and white bird diving towards us again. This bird meant to do us harm and it looked like it was going to pick on the smallest object – ME. I quickly started pointing both hands towards the GOTF and yelled – “take him”. Well the magpie did, it whacked into his helmet and nearly knocked him off the bike. Meanwhile, the RA was flapping her arms so much I thought the bike was going to take off. I hope that is the only angry magpie we encounter on this ride.

All in all it’s been a busy and eventful time. Hard to say what my favourite has been. I guess I’d have to say it’s the kids, it’s always the kids. But I can’t forget getting a jar of HONEY!

Cheers for now,

Bob